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| Add a Buffalo Sabres mask and puffy eyes from nights of crying, and you've got Ryan Miller |
(1) Magnus Arvedson must have broken a mirror
(2) At least the Canucks have their very own Jiri Tlusty
His teammates, of course, have been considerably less forgiving, with Tanner Glass suggesting to the media that it was airbrushed, and Kevin Bieksa promising to bring the ad to the attention of the locker room. I think these boys should leave Kesler and his 8 pack alone, and just thank god every day that Zdeno Chara isn't on their team.
(3) The Leafs can't lose forever. Right?
What bothers me is that it's not even statistically impossible.
The Leafs are currently 1-8-3 in their last 12 games. Saturday's loss to the Canucks marked their 8th straight loss. Kessel is grossly underproducing, which of course draws comparisons (unfair as they may be) to Tyler Seguin, and Mike Brown's moustache still hasn't fought anyone. The depression is magnified by the successes of the Senators, Viktor Stalberg (who was shipped to Chicago as part of the trade for Kris Versteeg, and is currently playing on the top line with Toews, has 10 pts, and is, most importantly and sadly, proving me right), and pretty much every other team in the NHL. BUT, I am not a hater, and so I am resolved to find at least three good things about the current team:
1. In a really endearing show of camaraderie, the Leafs have decided to show Nazem Kadri that no one on the team deserves to be playing outside of the AHL.
2. Giguere has a lot of respect for former Leaf goalies, as evidenced by his near-perfect imitation of Vesa Toskala against Mason Raymond's trickling 40 footer on Saturday.
3. Colby Armstrong is due back any day now, which is great news seeing as how a player who is currently on pace for 9 goals this season should do wonders for our offensive drought.
I'm sorry. I can't do it. I love them, and I will never leave them, but I'm bitter and depressed. I know I know - It's always darkest before dawn, you have to know the bad before you can have the good, BLAH BLAH BLAH.
(4) This just in: Sean Avery is still a giant D-bag.
Anyone who has ever read my blog or watched a hockey game with me knows that I love me my hockey fights. And bench brawls are to hockey fights what a 24 ounce porterhouse is to ground chuck - Bigger, bloodier, and one hundred times more delectable. Sunday was no exception, when the Edmonton Oilers and New York Rangers had a bona fide throwdown. Seeing as how these two teams are the furthest things from perennial rivals, one may ask how something like this could have happened. The answer: Sean Avery and his douchebaggery.
Word on the street is that Smid started goading Avery into a fight, and Avery turned him down, saying that he would drop the gloves off the next faceoff. When Smid started turning away, Avery sucker-punched him. It then turned into Stortini filling in Prust, MacIntyre fighting Boogaard, and Brandon Dubinsky grabbing Fraser from the bench (for which he has since been suspended). It was awesome.
I'm lusty for tlusty.
ReplyDeleteI really shouldn't have clicked on the chara link at work...
ReplyDeleteI don't think you watched the Canucks game. It was a Hamhuis miscue that led directly to the winning goal. Moreover, Rome was only -1 for the game. If you want a scapegoat, Andrew Alberts was -3 in just 11 minutes!
ReplyDeleteAnd the Canucks beat the Sabres last year - at home. I think what you meant was that they hadn't beaten the Sabres IN BUFFALO in the last seven years, which isn't that significant considering they don't play there every year.
I'm pretty sure you need to give a warning with that Chara link, I was kind enough to warn you... just sayin'
ReplyDeleteanonymous #1: I am unspeakably disappointed in myself for never seeing that word in his name before.
ReplyDeletemicah: I most certainly did watch the Canucks game, and I was also very aware that is was Hamhuis with the horrendous giveaway (it would have been impossible to miss it, as romany was cursing his name at the top of his lungs). I never said Aaron Rome was the reason for the miscue, or even that he was the reason why the Canucks lost - I simply mentioned that he was on the ice at the time that the goal happened, and used this as a segue to my larger point about Aaron Rome, which, despite Alberts having a worse +/- for that particular game, still stands. I still want to know why Ballard isn't getting Rome's ice time.
As for the record against Buffalo, thanks for the clarification. I had actually thought that the Canucks hadn't won against Buffalo at all in the last 7 years - a fact which STILL wouldn't have been all that impressive given how rarely they play one another, but it let me make a joke about Magnus Arvedson, so....
care: it's funnier this way ;)
I'd also like to respond to an email comment I received this morning, accusing me of ripping of another blog called Kurtenblog. For the record, I take accusations like that very seriously - I don't think this person realizes just how long I sit in front of a blank computer screen trying to be hilarious. But allow me to respond:
I read two hockey blogs. Down Goes Brown, and Canucks Hockey Blog. I also read tsn, Bill Simmons, and occasionally, the National Post. If you'd like to monitor my suspected proclivity for plagiarism, I suggest you peruse those sites. I also happen to be aware that two of my friends who read my blog also read Kurtenblog, which means that I would not only have to be disappointingly unoriginal to rip them off, I would also have to be unabashedly stupid in doing so. This is the internet people, where everyone who has ever had a thought is narcissitic enough to believe that everyone wants to hear about it - It is quite possible that two people will end up writing about the same thing.
Sean Avery is a D-Bag, but not for the incident listed above. Let me break it down for you. Sean Avery levels Fraser with a clean body check. Fraser gets up and skates away feeling shame. Smid then comes to Frasers defense...um yeah..... Avery insists on waiting, possibly for a break out pass. The, while Smid is looking directly at Avery, Avery levels him. Smid never took his eyes off Avery, and even had time to drop his gloves and get a hand on Avery's chest before Avery engaged. If you challenge someone to a fight, because you did not like a clean hit on one of your teammates, then you better not take your eyes off him until he is out of reach.
ReplyDeleteJosh - Granted it isn't a Todd Bertuzzi-esque sucker punch, but come on! Avery literally pounced on him as he was turning away. People are challenged to a fight for all sorts of reasons beyond avenging a dirty hit - That doesn't give them the right to trick them into putting their guard down.
ReplyDeleteIts worth noting too that Avery's sucker punch gave Smid a concussion.
ReplyDeleteLia, you invoke Bertuzzi's name (in vain), which begs the question: if everyone in the league hates Avery this much (including the league themselves) and someone finally deals with him ala Bert vs Moore, what would the fallout look like?
1) Avery broke the code - no excuse - should have been suspended.
ReplyDelete2) Stalberg > Versteeg for now - dear Kris wake up.
3) Leafs comeback against the Preds will be the beginning of a 2 game winning streak which will come crashing down against the Habs and Carey (I am more boring to interview than Sydney Crosby) Price.
4) The Leafs Winning has given Ron Wilson at least 1 more month to destroy this team.
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ReplyDeleteMattMack - Provocative question, and an appropriate one given the current "scandal" involving Colin Campbell. I think this is something worth writing about in more depth, but if Tyler Dellow's investigative work has shown us anything, it's that the NHL is swayed by public opinion and personal perceptions (at least with respect to disciplining players). This would lead us to conclude that if Avery was taken down ala Steve Moore, and if it wasn't at the hands of Ruutu, Boogaard, Simon or Pronger, we would see redacted documents and evasive press conferences on scale with the invasion of Iraq.
ReplyDeleteAnonymous - I like your style.
My guess is you have pictures of many hockey players with minimal clothing on your computer...
ReplyDelete